Many café-goers have unhappily slurped down a coffee that didn't turn out to be what they thought they were ordering, not wanting to call attention to their ignorance but desperately wondering how to get it right the next time. How could something as basic as coffee be so discouragingly mystifying?
It's confusing because there is little standard beyond the basic café. Order it, and you'll get an espresso (also called ans express)- that is much certain. A café crème (or simply "un crème" in waiter-speak) will get you a coffee with milk, but the amount of milk can vary from a few drops to a very light colored cup (usually the former). You'll rarely hear a French person order a café au lait- they'll call it a crème - and in general they'll never order one after 11 a.m. Normally the milk is added warm, but sometimes you'll be served a small pitcher of milk on the side. If your crème isn't light enough for you, don't be afraid to ask for "un peu plus du lait" and the server will bring you more to add. That's perfectly acceptable, especially at breakfast time. There's no formula, so don't be timid.
If you want a weaker cup, order a café Americain or allongé and the server will add hot water to an espresso, watering it down. It's usually possible to order a décaféiné (un déca), but not all cafés offer it.
Tea drinkers, order un thé, thé au lait (with milk), or une infusion, herbal tea.
When in France, don't even think about ordering a cappucino, even if you see it on the menu. They are usually not very good- save it for Italy!
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